You can’t deny the sizzlin’ chemistry between your characters any longer and now you’re ready to give in to their demands.

But maybe you’re a little nervous to add a romance into your story. After all, you DON’T want to be “that writer” who throws in a cheesy romance just for the sake of having a romance in the story! BLECH!

So how do you write a romantic relationship that’ll have readers cheering and not gagging? How do you create a relationship that has value, substance, and is totally 100% shippable?

You do four things, my friend:

1. Build up each character’s unique identity
2. Challenge their devotion to each other
3. Avoid cliche dialogue
4. Focus on love, not lust

So what do these four tips mean? Let’s break it down little by little, bromigo!

Look bub: NO ONE exists merely for the sake of being “the other half” of another person. As “romantic” as that might sound, it’s just not believable.

The same goes for your characters. You can’t create a character just to be the romantic interest for another character in your story! That’s a rookie mistake, friend-o. If you want readers to appreciate the relationship your character enters into, readers must first appreciate the character for who they are.

So, focus on building a unique identity for your individual before you ship them off to Loveland.

But what does that entail, exactly? The three vital building blocks of character: 

1. His personal goal and primary objective
2. His flaw(s)
3. His strengths

A personal goal is a character’s unique motivation for participating the primary objective. The primary objective is the high-stakes journey your hero participates in. 

So for instance, Katniss Everdeen’s personal goal was to protect her sister Prim from the threat of the Hunger Games. So, Katniss volunteered in her sister’s place. This believable, personal goal made it easy to see why Katniss would willingly participate in her high-stakes journey: the Hunger Games.

So what is your character’s personal goal? What is their uniquely personal, emotional reason for participating in the primary objective?

This is the foundation of strong character structure. If you don’t know the answers to these questions, then your character is not ready to fall in love just yet. In fact, they’re not ready for anything just yet— plain and simple!

Your character’s unique identity involves their heritage, background, and personality. But most importantly, it involves their flaws. What serious flaw(s) does your character have that needs addressing? Your character must be forced to acknowledge this flaw through the hero’s journey. Maybe they’re selfish, or maybe they’re a habitual liar!

You need to understand their flaw(s) because you need to see how this flaw will affect the relationship they enter into. Will their better half help them overcome their flaw? Or will this flaw tangle up the web they weave?

Your reader needs some clear evidence of your character’s flaw before they fall in love. This helps readers see your character as a real person who has potential. So write scenes where you can organically display to your reader what internal challenges your character fights against. 

Lastly, you gotta know and understand your character’s strengths. What do they bring to the table as an individual? What do they bring to the story as an individual? Are they a devoted dude? Are they a hard worker? Or a noble warrior? What strengths of theirs can potentially enhance a relationship or help their boo improve as a person?

Before your character finds true love, they have to have something of substance to bring to the table. These three things will give your character the substance they need to stand on their own two feet. Cultivating and crafting these aspects of your character through the hero’s journey gives readers a chance to love them for who they are first before they attach to someone else.

Now your character is ready to fall in love. So you throw them together ‘meet cute’ style and BOOM– fireworks! Your two characters have hit it off and they are nuts about each other. Good for them.

But, how strong is their bond if it’s only been rose-colored glasses and puppy dog eyes all day long? So how do you do deepen their relationship and prove they’ve got what it takes? You throw some hell and high water at ’em.

Giving this relationship a tidal wave of trials (a trial wave) will prove the strength of its bonds. They’ll prove their devotion to one another by overcoming personal flaws, fighting for one another, or making personal sacrifices. 

Your character is on a journey, he has a primary objective to achieve– will the relationship have to be put on hold for the sake of the journey? Take Aragorn and Arwen for instance. Aragorn loved Arwen with his whole half-man, half-elf being, but wanted to do what he could to help Frodo destroy the One Ring. That meant putting his heart on a shelf and setting his beloved “free”. That test of separation only proved to bring them closer together in the end and we the readers adored their devotion to one another as a result. 

Now, maybe the test focuses on the character’s individual flaw– maybe the character will finally get the ONE THING that he wanted all along, but this very thing will threaten the relationship. What will the character do? Will he act for himself or will he sacrifice his personal goal for the sake of his lover?

Maybe an old flame will reemerge, thus testing the character’s loyalty to their new love?! OOH! Now THAT is sure to prove whether the relationship will have the legs to stand on!

The point is made: your relationship is all fluff unless you test the strength of their bonds. So, discover what that weak spot in the relationship could be, attack it head on, and see how the relationship can either grow or die.

“You’re eyes glitter like the stars, sugar bear.” He cooed.

“Well, your smile lights up my world like the sun on a clear day, shmoopsie poo.” She whispered.

“You’re more beautiful than the moon.”

“But you’re hotter than the sun.”

YEAH?! Well, you’re both making me sick so just shut the heck up already! See, overused, cliché dialogue like this makes absolutely 0% of readers swoon, melt, or wish they had “what they have”. It makes 100% of us gag.

So how do you avoid the cliché dialogue pit holes? You stop picturing your characters like they’re cut from some cookie-cutter mold. 

Their relationship is unique just like they are. That means you must tailor the dialogue to highlight the beauty of their unique relationship.

Having the characters talk to one another in a “kissy boo boo” style is a shallow depiction of romance. True love is when two people share a deep and intimate knowledge of one another. Therefore, their dialogue should reflect that special bond.

This means getting down to the details of your character– Oh yes, the nitty-gritty.

The key to romantic dialogue that’s cherished by readers is vulnerability. These two characters have to be willing to be open, show their scars to one another, and trust that the other person will cherish them nonetheless. And therein lies the key to proving to your readers that your characters share a special intimacy unlike any other.

THAT is what the good stuff is made of 😉

The market is oversaturated with books focused on erotic, lustful, super sexualized Pulp Fiction romance. And what the world is really starving for is love. 

Not enough works out there represent the true power of love. Instead, they focus on just the fringe benefits of it. But getting to the core of what love truly is means focusing on the trials and tests that love faces and endures.

So if you want your fictional relationship to be taken seriously, focus on what love means TO YOU— on a deep level. Emphasize the unique friendship these two characters share, as well as the trust and the respect they have for one another. Emphasize the little moments that feel like nothing but mean everything to them. 

So does this mean that your characters can NEVER get physical? Displays of intimacy like kissing, embracing, making out, etc. should be sprinkled, NOT dumped in your story. Place these delicate moments during times when cementing trust between two characters is pivotal to the plot. Dumping buckets-o-love on readers distracts from the story and doesn’t do anything to remind readers that the focus is still on the plot, not just the characters’ relationship. So be selective and always remember that less is more.

In conclusion beloveds, romantic relationships can be fun and games, but NOT JUST fun and games. Be sure you get to the meat of your relationships by:

1. Building up each character’s unique identity
2. Challenging their devotion to each other
3. Avoiding cliche dialogue
4. Focusing on love, not lust

If you do this, your fictional romance will be shipped hard by the masses! What is your no. 1 fictional romance? Why did you love this relationship? Share it with me below, I’d love to hear about your favorite couple!